“Who else would make lame PowerPoint decks we’d all be embarrassed to deliver? Who else would postulate on project management for beginners?” — Cocktail Straw: Jerkface
“A 4-hour conference call? I guess so; it’s as good time a time as any to send out my resume.”
“It’s 5:00, so if you don’t have a good answer to “why can’t this wait?”, then unless you’re bleeding, I’m out of here.”
“A 3-hour meeting? Pass. Just send me the PowerPoint and I’ll ignore it just like if I were in the room.”
“Hmmm… a lot of people seem to be at a “downtown meeting” this morning. I’m sure they are hard at work and not at the Giants parade.”
“A college class came in to get a tour and see how a company works. I assume it was a “scared straight” program.”
“Giants win! Is it too soon to call in sick tomorrow?”
“I’m willing to admit I’m prejudiced against PowerPoint, probably because I only see it under the worst of circumstances— in meetings.”
“If you want a sense of how pointless and repetitive my job is, just try to watch 8 hours of #SuperBowl pregame coverage.”
“No, I don’t care how many exclamation points and CAPITAL LETTERS you use, I am not answering emails from the toilet.”