“If I told the boss the sun will rise at 6:57 tomorrow, he’d tell me to make it 6:30, then later complain I’m not proactive enough.”
“The Perfect Plan:
1. Shoot boss with arrow.
2. Blame poor AT&T coverage for not calling 9-1-1 in time.
3. Tell police it was Cupid.”
“Why don’t people answer your questions? Let’s start with how you never include the original email in your replies so all context is lost.”
"No Meeting Mondays" sounds like a great idea. In theory. -
Imagine a Monday morning unlike any other. It’s a better Monday; one where you don’t get to the office after huffing exhaust fumes during your commute, or having a perfume induced allergy attack after being forcibly snuggled up next to a 55–year-old administrative assistant on the train and have…
Sounds great. In theory. But the reality is you’re just moving meetings from Monday to Tuesday, making Tuesday much worse. This won’t decrease meetings one bit. And that’s only if the rule actually sticks— frankly I find most managers would just ignore it, feeling it applies to OTHER meetings, or the meetings of the common worker ant and not someone as important as them.
Read Joel’s proposal, and then tell me if I’m wrong.
“You don’t share information with the team, but now you’re surprised we didn’t make the right decision? Did you think we read minds?”
“I know you think you’re too smart for spell check, so explain how you sent an email to the client that said “thank you for your patience’s.”
“No one is impressed that you’re sending work emails on Saturday afternoon. No one.”
“The conference call software lets us record by pressing #2. We should send the tapes to Guantanamo, so the US can stop waterboarding.”
“The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Well, ONE of the roads is. The boss will get there too, but he’s taking a different route.”
“Walk off with my pen again and you can keep it— it won’t be much use to me after I stab you in the neck with it anyway.”